I'll be missing you

It’s been a while since we were together, but to me it seems like years. When we’re not together, time seems to run slower, but not for my tears, they run faster, and take longer time.

To be honest, ever since you told me the word forever, I could never imagine how my life would be without you. But now that I’m living my life without you around, my life sucks. I loved my life more when you were around. I’m simply missing you.

I’ll still live the coming days to the highest. 21months being with you, is the greatest gift that’s ever been given to me, I’m neither lying nor joking. Being with you again is my biggest dream.

Every night I sleep, you’re the only one I think about, the only one I want to dream of. Everywhere I go, there’s always sign of you. Every time you’re not around, world seems to stop.

When I thought forever didn’t exist anymore, you passed, came into my life, and showed me that forever was still alive, it still existed. But then you left me, left me wanting you. You know how hard is that for me? You know how long it’s been taking me to forget all the sweet memories we’ve shared together?

I miss you... I really miss you..

You’ve always been my other half, my Homer, my sweet thoughts, my paradise, my simply everything.

Rainbow <3

I’m not really a “rainbow” person. My eyes are not good in catching rainbows on afternoons and after rains. But this week, God opened my eyes to the magnificent beauty of rainbow.

No I haven’t seen a real rainbow but I had a dream last Tuesday, I was on looking towards the shore, watching the crashing waves. I was counting the waves, listening to the noise they made as they crash to the shore. The water was loud, and yet I was quiet.

Then suddenly, a rainbow flashed in front of me with bright and sharp colors (just like in the picture). It wasn’t like the usual rainbow that has faint colors. The one I saw was very vivid, almost like a painting.

The dream made me think (and meditate) about rainbows.

Rainbow. It is the seal of God’s covenant to Noah. Like a signature to His promise. God is reminding me that all His promises to me are YES and AMEN, and I have Jesus as my guarantor for the promise. And though it tarries, I will wait for it. *hush, hush heart*

Rainbow. In, Revelation 3:4, it is written, “And He who was sitting was like a jasper stone and a sardius in appearance; and there was a rainbow around the throne, like an emerald in appearance.” And according to my usong bible, the rainbow which look like an emerald, pertains to the mercy of the Lord. Wow. The mercy of God, His goodness to take us out of our misery because of our disobedience. Grabe. 

Rainbow. Colors. Different colors of grace. Different colors of God’s goodness to His people. Different colors of blessings and trials. All colors are needed for the grand canvas. 

Oh.. how beautiful is the heart of my Jesus.